What the Hell Are You Doing?

Hi again! Welcome to the new year.

Go ahead and write it down somewhere so that the reality of 2026 starts to materialize in a real way.

At least that’s how it works for me. I have to actually write out the date somehow. Usually, it’s in an organic way. Filling out a form or something like that. There’s actually a moment where the reality washes over me in a tangible way that I can feel. Some kind of chemical reaction. It can be very motivating!

At first, I’m just marveling at the passing of time. All the little bubbles of memories start to surface and pop. I guess our lives flash before us sometimes.

Huge calendar events like Christmas, New Year’s, and Hanukkah are milestones that can make us take stock, but also look forward.

The music business doesn’t really run on the same calendar as the rest of the world. The holiday season and early months of the year are a great time to make plans and start to put those plans in motion before the business comes out of hibernation.

From November to February, the music business is just sort of unplugged. It’s actually a blessing in disguise because we all work so hard throughout the year that it’s nice to see everybody take a break, and it sort of lets us all relax for a second. Sort of a shorter version of Covid. Lol.

I still don’t know how to sit still so these months are difficult for me. I think they are for a lot of folks. I start to go a little crazy, and it’s easy to think that business won’t pick up again in February. We all live with this crazy feeling that the last gig could be the very last one we ever get offered. It’s just built into being self-employed or having to make money from your passion and art. It’s a great life with just a couple tough aspects.

Winter Solstice is a great time to start looking forward. The days start to grow longer, and the darkness literally begins to disappear as the light comes back into our lives. The planet just isn’t as close to the sun. I mean, if you believe in science and all that stuff. Lol.

Around November, I start to go into a dormant phase. I don’t seem to be evergreen. I go through seasons like a plant or a tree. Leaves and flowers come and go and, for some reason, there’s always a worry that they won’t come back. They always do, though. The days do get longer and warmer and our leaves turn green again. I mean, didn’t I learn anything from Annie?

Eventually, I start to sort of come out of this this dormant phase and begin to look forward in a way I didn’t used to when I was younger. Part of getting older helps me see larger chunks of time.

Let me try and explain what I mean.

You know how we all use digital calendars? There are different ways to view those calendars on our screens. You can view a daily view, a weekly view, a monthly view, or you can view all the months at the same time.

As I get older, I seem to be able to view the coming years in a holistic way rather than one day at a time. Time moves more quickly and so does our relationship to it.

E=mc2.

I always begin to feel better as I decide what my goals are for the year and even the following years. As I think through them, talk them out with friends, loved ones and colleagues, I begin to crystallize my artistic direction. It usually takes me a few weeks. Everybody’s different. It used to take me longer.

I start to literally put calendar entries in and just work toward those goals. I don’t just follow those things perfectly, but I do use that as a map. Sometimes we have to stray from the map and take the long way or learn about a shortcut but generally, we’re heading in that direction. Toward that goal.

So that’s what this time of year is always about for me. Who am I? What kind of artist do I want to be and what do I have to say? Where am I going and what the hell am I doing?

Happy New Year!

Jeff Berkley is a San Diego songwriter, musician, and producer, whose soulful writing, guitar mastery, and visionary production have shaped the Southern California music scene. He has collaborated with icons like Jackson Browne, David Crosby, the Indigo Girls, and Ben Harper; in 1999 won the Kerrville New Folk Songwriting Award. With his bands Berkley Hart and Jeff Berkley & the Banned, he has earned multiple San Diego Music Awards, including Artist of the Year in 2023, and was inducted into the San Diego Music Hall of Fame. Berkley has released numerous acclaimed albums and continues to perform, produce, and create music rooted in heart and storytelling.