President Von Clownstick himself is not, of course, the sole indicator of the true depth of the decline of Western Civilization. He should be regarded as...
The January 12th edition of the venerable San Diego Reader contained an interview with yours truly (along with a colorful, kissable photograph) and I am grateful...
Terry Daktyll’s pale, flute-thin arm reaches up to put another cassette into the empty mouth of the VCR. It’s a recent set-closing performance of David Bowie’s...
Hi! This is the first time I’ve ever sat down to write my column during a dream, so bear with me if things are weirder than...
The zombies are still out there and our country remains in peril. The only positive thing Donald Trump (“Il Douchebag”) was able to accomplish in this...
A FALL CLASS ACT From the mailbox: Dear Hose: Enough already about your liberal politics and kiss-Hillary’s-butt deviant desires. The country’s gone to the dogs and...
The principal virtue of democracy is that it makes a good show–one incomparably bizarre, amazing, shocking, and obscene… it has become simply a battle of charlatans...
One of the more frightening recent events I personally witnessed was when several monkeys began flying out of Taylor Swift’s butt, seemingly intent on taking over...
Recently I was requisitioned to serve as host/announcer at two separate quasi-beauty pageants. The contestants were happily of the female gender. (Thank you, God.) My anticipation...
