The San Diego Troubadour

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215/420 News

On February 17th, a research team affiliated with UCSD announced the results of a ten-year study on marijuana and pain. It concluded that pot does, indeed, offer substantial relief from certain kinds of chronic pain, including AIDS, diabetes, and spinal pain. The research team presented their findings to the state legislature. Whether that leads to across-the-board legalization and taxation remains to be seen. Right now, the "weed with roots in hell" has been legal since 1996 for those over 21 who have a doctor's recommendation.

My buddy Don, who is 60, suffers from multiple health problems: debilitating nighttime leg cramps, scoliosis, and severe lower back pain. Recently, Don took a musician (!) friend's advice and asked a doctor for a medical marijuana prescription. On January 5th, his late mother's birthday, Don got his prescription. Now his bathroom medicine cabinet has prescription bottles with labels reading, "Grand-Daddy Purple," "Blue Dream," "Cotton," "God's Gift," and "Bubble Goo," alongside the usual bottles of aspirin, laxatives, and Viagra. Don tells me the prescription-strength pot takes his mind off the pain (and makes him really hungry!), but he only smokes it after work because he gets so relaxed and mellow.

I tried marijuana once when I was in college, but I didn't swallow.

Beisbol News

Baseball season begins soon.

Fact: between 1981 and 1984, the Padres had a backup catcher named Doug Gwosdz. His nickname was "eye chart!"

Ba-da-bing!!

Metaphor Update

I recently watched a show on History called "American Pickers," which follows a pair of men who scour barns and attics throughout the Midwest, hunting for antiques. In one scene, one of them picked up a stuffed bird dating from the 1920s and commented, "This smells like a sumo wrestler took a dump on a burning tire!"

Ba-da-bing!!

Zeppelin Update

On January 31st, our black Lab-Rhodesian dog, Zeppelin, turned 16 years of age, or somewhere between 85 and 112 years old in human terms. She is stone deaf, has cataracts, and takes drugs to combat doggie Alzheimer's. Ol' Zeppy stands or lies down and stares at Sandi and me, panting all the while, waiting for one of us to move. Whoever walks out of the room gets followed closely. Wherever we stop, she stops. Sometimes we'll walk in circles just to wind her up! She has no clear signal to indicate that she needs to pee or poop, so we have to guess. So far, at least, the old gal is not pooping in the house. Zeppelin's bark, I'm happy to say, still rattles the walls. She sounds like a barking rhinoceros. It's like seeing myself in 50 years!

Ba-da-bing!

Next month: The April Fool's column (or not.)